You came here because something in your relationship deserves more attention than it’s been getting.

That instinct is worth trusting.

Most couples don’t arrive at therapy because they stopped loving each other. They arrive because the distance has grown too wide, the arguments have become too familiar, or the closeness they once had feels just out of reach — and they’re not sure how to find their way back.

That gap between where you are and where you want to be is exactly where this work begins.

I work with couples who are ready to understand not just what is happening in their relationship, but why — at the level of the nervous system, the body, and the deep patterns each partner brings from long before this relationship began. That understanding changes things. Not slowly, through accumulated insight over years of weekly sessions, but often in ways that are felt quickly, that shift how you move through a room together, how you reach for each other, how you repair.

This is the work I was made to do.

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Relationships don’t struggle because people don’t care enough. They struggle because the nervous system is running old protection strategies that made sense once — and are now quietly dismantling intimacy.

Every couple I work with carries two individual histories, two nervous systems, two sets of learned responses to closeness and conflict. My job is to help you see those patterns clearly, understand where they came from, and build something new together — not through willpower or communication scripts, but through genuine change at the level of the body and the brain.

I work in extended sessions, not the traditional 50-minute hour. I ask couples to face each other. I pay close attention to what’s happening between you in real time — the subtle shifts in your face, your voice, your body — and I use those moments as the material of our work. What we’re building together is what Dr. Stan Tatkin calls secure functioning: a relationship where real safety, fairness, and deep mutual care are the foundation, not the occasional outcome.

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My clinical work integrates several bodies of research and practice, chosen because they work together to address the full complexity of how relationships function.

PACT — Psychobiological Approach to Couples Therapy

Developed by Dr. Stan Tatkin, PACT integrates attachment theory, arousal regulation, and the neuroscience of human connection. It is the primary framework of my couples work. I trained directly with Dr. Tatkin and remain in ongoing clinical mentorship with him and with master couples therapist Jeff Pincus, LCSW.

Somatic Experiencing—Developed by Dr. Peter Levine, Somatic Experiencing works with the nervous system directly — helping partners release what the body is holding rather than relying solely on cognitive insight. Trauma doesn’t live in the story we tell; it lives in the body. This work honors that.

EMDR—For partners carrying specific memories or experiences that surface in the relationship, EMDR offers a precise and effective way to process what weekly conversation often can’t fully reach.

Nature-based and animal-assisted therapy—The natural world has a profound capacity to regulate the nervous system. I integrate nature immersion, animal-assisted work, somatic movement, and mindfulness into my practice for couples who are ready to engage beyond the traditional therapeutic setting. This fall, that work expands to a private 28-acre sanctuary outside Nashville.

Mindfulness-based stress reduction—With over two decades of personal practice and formal clinical training, mindfulness is woven into every aspect of the way I work.

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I hold a Bachelor of Fine Arts from New York University and a Master of Social Work from the University of Iowa. I am a Licensed Independent Social Worker credentialed with BCBS/Wellmark.

I began my career in traditional individual and couples therapy. Over time — through clinical experience, deep training, and the work itself — I came to understand that couples often make their most profound breakthroughs in extended, immersive sessions rather than weekly appointments. That conviction shapes everything about how I practice today.

I bring both rigorous clinical training and genuine personal investment to this work. I know what it costs a relationship to go without the right support. And I know what becomes possible when two people are given the right conditions to find their way back to each other.

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If you’re ready to begin, I’d be honored to work with you.

EWHurlin@gmail.com